In the lighter mood: You Bastard

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A man is in court for murder and the judge says ‘You are charged with beating your wife to death with a hammer.’

Then a voice at the back of the court says, ‘you bastard.’

Then the judge continues, ‘you are also charged with beating Your daughter to death with a hammer.’

Again the voice at the back of the court says, ‘you bastard.’

The judge says, ‘now we cannot have any more of these outbursts from you or I shall charge You With contempt, now what is the problem?’ 
Then the man at the back of the court says, ‘fifteen years I lived next door to that bastard and everytime I asked to borrow a hammer he said he never had one!

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